Noodle Talk was taken to task on Monday, or — to give it a more accurate and positive spin — last Monday, we went to the Trenton Area Soup Kitchen (aka TASK) to lead a Noodle Talk group for patrons. NT was already being used in TASK’s adult education writing program as prompts for subject matter but this was the first time people were gathering for the sole purpose of exploring the common bonds that connect us with each other.
TASK began in 1982 in response to conditions not unlike today’s America: a deep recession, increased joblessness, and social service cutbacks. In addition to providing weekday meals at its main facility and 3 Trenton churches, TASK addresses other critical needs through programs such as: adult tutoring in GED preparation and ESL; computer classes; counseling; legal aid; medical services; meal-time child care; and telephone, mail, and fax access. It is also home to several thriving arts initiatives: the A-Team Artists of Trenton; the Share Project for performing arts outreach (with its own house band, the FunTASKtiks), and the aforementioned writer’s workshop. A first-time visitor can’t help but be impressed with the infectious energy of the volunteers, and the vibrant community which they serve.
Noodle Talks usually don’t get started until late in the day but here we were, 11 of us, sitting around a table in a windowless conference room at 9:15 in the morning. Scores of brilliantly colored, flower-like, paper sculptures — an art installation — looked down upon us from the acoustic-tile ceiling. One of the first questions drawn was: “Where would you like to be a tree. Please explain your answer.” In some respects, it’s easy to dismiss this as a cornball, New Age-y kind of cliche, but the responses I find are invariably quite the opposite — the expression of a natural longing to provide for others. Two women imagined being fruit trees that would feed people (one as a banana tree in Hawaii, the other as a pecan-tree in Georgia); a third woman chose a park setting where she’d spread joy to the people who came to relax and play; and a fourth participant spoke about being an enormous tree in the forest because that evoked family for her and more branches meant more life.
A young volunteer, a psychology major at a nearby university, pulled a question that was comically apt: “If scientists were to name a particular personality disorder after you, which of your character traits would be an obvious candidate, and what would the disorder be called?” Her answer — passive aggressiveness — was followed by riotous round of confessions, examples of vengeful behavior that were heavier perhaps on the aggressiveness than the passivity, and definitely eyebrow raising. The student, who had the sweetest, most mild demeanor, told of watering her roommate’s plants with bleach when she discovered the latter had eaten her food. Pissed off at a landlord? Offer him a drink with an ice cube that had fallen on the floor, as one tenant did. Someone being obnoxious? Sprinkle hot pepper under her nose while she’s napping. Or surreptitiously season a guest’s food with epsom salt to bring on the runs. Husband annoying you? Wait till he’s asleep and apply the ugliest color nail polish to his fingernails the night before he begins a job at Amtrak. (NOTE: No human beings were killed, or relationships destroyed, in the course of these incidents — at least as far as we know.)
Things took a more serious turn when another psychologically oriented question came up: “What do you hide behind?” “Pretending that I don’t care about recognition and acknowledgment,” a woman answered as her eyes became teary.
Question: “In preparing for a journey back in time, what items would you pack to distribute as gifts along the way?”
Young woman: Love.
Young man: Food, money, and guns.
Because his answer was such a startling contrast to the first response, he was asked to elaborate. “Food to feed the slaves, money to help them buy necessities, and guns so they could free themselves,” he said. Different words — perhaps the same impulse.
In Noodle Talk, the emphasis is on personal experience, and we try to discourage conversation that veers off into opinion and social commentary. That changed though when a 34-year-old man picked the question: “How do you feel about the younger generation? Older generation? Your own generation?” His response precipitated a spirited discussion about Trenton’s impoverished population. “I feel like I’m 55,” he said, comparing himself to the aimless youth he sees in his community. Others made equally trenchant comments:
Years ago, we wanted schooling but there wasn’t any. Nowadays, children got schooling but they don’t want it.
Kids today want to be adults and adults are acting like kids. There’s no adult supervision.
Young people don’t know the value of a dollar or their own history.
There’s no community or structure.
Mothers are on drugs and kids have to raise themselves.
We can talk all we want right here but what good will that do? What can we do to help our own people?
The last statement felt like the seed of a new group at TASK, one that could eventually become a tree like the ones mentioned earlier, feeding and nurturing those in need. By now though it was 10:30 and time to end. Next month, we intend to see if our freshly planted seed has had a chance to sprout.
TASK lists almost 30 ways a person can volunteer or contribute both on-site and off-site. Here is how one person describes his experience:
The doors had not opened at TASK. It was a cold winter morning and I was doing volunteer work. It was a perfect time for me to sort through some of the clothing that had been donated. When the doors opened, we would be offering the clothes to those who needed warmth.
I noticed that just about all the clothes were adult-sized, so I was surprised to come across a pair of child’s mittens. I didn’t have any particular category to put them in so I set them aside and kept on working. When the doors finally opened, a lot of people came rushing in to get out of the cold. Among them was a distinguished looking elderly gentleman with gray hair and a beard. He had a little boy with him who looked to be about three years old.
The man sat down and helped the boy take off his jacket. Then he hugged him. It gave me a warm feeling inside to see such a loving and caring relationship between the two.
But the next thing the man did really touched my heart. He took the child’s small, cold hands into his own to warm them. At that instant my spirit soared! “The mittens!” I exclaimed. I just couldn’t hold my excitement within. And as I walked over to the spot where I had placed the mittens I thought about how the Lord must have known all along that those mittens were meant for that little boy!
The man was still holding the boy’s hands when I brought the brightly colored mittens over to them. And I wish you could have seen the youngster’s face light up when I handed the mittens to him!
The man looked up at me and quietly said, “Thank you.” To which I replied, “You’re welcome.”
That was all that needed to be said.
Please visit http://www.trentonsoupkitchen.org/volunteer.php to learn how you can make a difference in the lives of fellow citizens who might be less well off than you.
Tags: A-Team Artists of Trenton, conversation game, conversation starters, conversation stirrers, ice breakers, Noodle Talk, poverty, soup kitchen, TASK, the FunTASKtiks, Trenton, Trenton Area Soup Kitchen
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